Growing up in Berlin and Belgium with three siblings I suffered from my adolescence from severe depressions. In my early twenties after my brother’s suicide I quit my university studies and started traveling form 2005 to 2011 in New Zealand, the South Pacific, Australia, Southeast Asia, India, the Middle East, Central and South America, Hawaii, the Canary Islands and in the Caribbean. Although making valuable life experiences, radically changing my way of life and also having happy periods my feeling of alienation grew stronger. I failed settling down in the tropics outside the system as well as in social relationships. My loneliness and latent death wish in combination with an extreme diet somehow caused loss of appetite which made me unintentionally lose weight and develop health issues, I was forced to move back in with my parents. Not finding any organic causes I got stigmatizing diagnoses, that turned me into a social outcast shunned by relatives and friends, for years I lived in total isolation, involuntarily starving nobody understanding my body wouldn’t let me force food upon it. It was years of total desperation and feeling of hopelessness. Finally I ended up in a psychiatric ward which was worse than hell, it felt like I was surrounded by devils who were torturing me (almost) to death. At last I was given up for dead.
Like a miracle I survived and managed to recover by myself. Still having a bit of faith left in the legal system I tried filing lawsuits. The plandemic ahead the scandals I was exposing were too much a threat to the system, lawyers, judges and the police showed to be corruptible, the media was covering up, independent alternative media too fearful to report about my case and my claims.